Rewiring Your Nervous System with EMDR Therapy in Denver, CO
By Jordan Kurtz (she/her), MA, LPCC, EMDR Therapist in Denver, CO
Part of my due diligence as an EMDR therapist at the beginning of the therapy journey entails asking about prior therapy experiences. Common complaints I hear from clients include self-compassion work that felt hollow. Suggestions like, Recite in front of the mirror, ‘I am lovable’ three times a day, or Write three positive thoughts to counter each negative thought you have. While there are certainly merits to these practices, I can resonate with client takeaways that these exercises can feel inauthentic or simply impossible underneath daily shame or heavy stressors.
Polyvagal Theory: Explanation of Why “Self-Love” Is So Complex and How EMDR Therapy in Denver Can Help
The research lens that underpins EMDR therapy - Polyvagal Theory - supports client “stuckness” with this type of self-compassion work. Rather than stigmatizing clients as “resistant” or unwilling to identify and implement the positive, Polyvagal Theory recognizes:
Trauma is understood as any distressing event that creates an enduring negative impact upon the self and body
The components of a traumatic event (i.e. thoughts, feelings, images, smells, and sensations) are stored within the mind and body as they were experienced at the time of the event
Trauma symptoms are therefore a body’s response to the nervous system being stuck in the past
Without adaptive processing of these traumatic experiences- aka, our “stuckness” resulting from the past- it is difficult, bordering intangible, to produce positive outlooks on the self, world and others in the present
Cultivating Self-Compassion with EMDR Therapy in Denver, CO.
Through Polyvagal Theory, we have a better understanding of why self-compassion without proper support can be insubstantial. So, where does Denver EMDR therapy fit into the picture? As mentioned above, trauma is stored in state specific form (i.e. our past dominates how we think, feel and act in the present). EMDR therapy is composed of eight phases (see our previous blog breaking down what to expect with EMDR therapy for a more thorough explanation), with earlier phases focusing on 1) exploring the impact of the trauma in the present, and 2) breaking down the traumatic event into smaller slices, such as the image that represents the worst part of the experience and negative beliefs about oneself related to that experience. In the fourth phase of EMDR therapy, called Desensitization, the therapist guides the client through safe processing of targeted portions of the traumatic experience. Through successive rounds, the distressing emotions and body sensations as well as negative thoughts begin to neutralize, allowing the client to reflect back upon the experience with lower-zero levels of distress and the absence of self-blame or assumption of responsibility.
Phase 5- Installation- is where we begin to hone in on cultivation and implementation of the positive. Why is later in EMDR therapy when the positive enters the picture? Let’s come back to Polyvagal Theory once more: all parts of trauma are housed in the body as they felt when the trauma occurred. If we do not process these “maladaptively” stored memories first, any positive reframe we attempt to attach to the trauma in the present is in direct competition with the past. The Desensitization Phase that precedes Installation clears the way for new positive beliefs, emotions and sensations to take root because the “yuck” of the past has been neutralized.
Before processing in the Desensitization Phase begins, our Denver EMDR therapists use Phase 3- Assessment- to determine not only negative self-oriented beliefs related to the trauma, but also beliefs an individual would like to hold about themselves once the trauma has been processed (i.e. a self-compassion framework authored by you!) When we hit the Installation Phase (Phase 5) we have processed the yuck and are ready to sow the seeds for a new perspective about ourselves, the world and others in relation to the trauma. Common phrases clients choose to implement in Installation include:
I am lovable
I am good enough
I did the best I could
I can trust myself
I am now in control
I am capable
The tool of bilateral stimulation used to neutralize negative beliefs in the Desensitization Phase is also used in in the Installation Phase, but this time it is used in conjunction with focus on the positive belief.
The positive beliefs listed above are certainly reminiscent of self-compassion exercises we may have seen in other therapy settings. The difference this time is we have somatically processed the trauma of the past first to create room for a new, self-validating conceptualization of the trauma.
Excited to learn more about EMDR therapy? Check out our other EMDR therapy blogs:
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Schedule a free 20-minute consult call to see if EMDR therapy in Denver is right for you.
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Meet The Writer: Jordan Kurtz, EMDR Therapist in Denver, CO.
Jordan Kurtz (she/her) is a Denver EMDR therapist, couples counselor, and staff writer at CZTG. Jordan focuses on therapy for grief, trauma, adolescence, and relationships. Her approach is authentic, warm, and affirming, which she interweaves throughout her use of advanced evidence-based modalities, including EMDR, Emotion Focused Therapy for Couples (EFT), and somatic therapy. She provides EMDR and general trauma therapy in Denver and virtually throughout the state of Colorado. If you’d like to work with Jordan, feel free to reach out to schedule a consultation call.